Emotional resilience is being able to adapt and thrive in times of stress and hard experiences. It is an important skill for coping with all of life’s difficulties. Helping build emotional resilience in your child when they are young will allow them to grow this skill over their lifetime and help them navigate tough times. What can you do to make sure you are fostering this skill in your children? Understanding that having a stable home base experience will provide kids with the support structure they need to fall back on when needed. This will allow them to grow into confident and self-sufficient adults. Starting at home, structure and routines are key to building stability.

• Make family dinner (without electronics!) a priority time to build connections and foster discussions. This helps kids learn how to talk about their feelings in a positive environment, helping them to open up about how they feel when they are stressed or upset.
• Set aside predictable times for homework, play, and chores. In addition to giving them a sense of responsibility for the household, giving kids age-appropriate chores helps them to develop confidence and self-esteem.
• Having structure and routine provides a sense of security. As does setting clear boundaries and enforcing consequences. Predictability of the consequences is not harsh, it keeps kids feeling safe when limits are consistent.
• Designate the home as a safe space to share their feelings at any age. Use active listening to show that you are paying attention. It is important to work together to recognize and name the emotion, validate it (all emotions allowed here!), and then work on coping skills. We are unable to control others and our experiences, but we can control our response to events, good and bad. This can include deep breathing exercises to calm our body, working through the problem to find a solution, or simply a hug to let them know you are there to support them no matter what.

Confidence is another hallmark of developing emotional resilience. Give kids the opportunity to make decisions, and when they make mistakes (as we all do), identify the specifics and work through problem solving with them on solutions to consider the next time they encounter that situation. Instilling good and clear morals will help guide decisions as well. When kids are recognized and praised for their strengths, they build confidence.

Model generosity and compassion. Show your kids ways they can help others (by donating time and/or resources) so they can recognize themselves as having a positive impact on their community. Join [DA6.1]them in activities where they can serve others. Explore different societies and cultures through books, movies, and travel.

Making connections with the world and other people helps children as well. As they grow, kids need to make connections outside of the house. Encourage and facilitate setting up play dates or going to the park so your child can make and develop friendships with their peers. Continue conversations with your child as they grow and experience new friendships, helping to navigate concerns that arise. Encouraging them to talk with and get to know adults in the community including teachers, pediatricians, and friendly neighbors.

There are many ways to explore the world and help build emotional resilience, so children are ready to meet the challenges they will face. Explore together and always keep an open-door policy.

Resources for Stress - The Kids Mental Health Foundation